Snow Day

Well, the Gnu Herd was originally gonna be broadcasting live from the Ice Rink down at the beach, where The Skating Gnu had a traveling double-header slated for this morning. How ironic that Ice Hockey gets canceled due to snow and ice. Only in the South, folks. Only in the South.

Right now, the Cape Fear region who was hosting us for the games is totally iced over. Couldn't we just skate to the game??

We got dumped on here at the house. So far, there's 3 1/2 to 4 inches on the ground in our neck of the woods. Tobacco Road is shut down, either from the snow itself or all the dumbasses who can't drive in it. It would be entertaining to watch if the stakes weren't so high. I have no problem with idiots eliminating themselves from the gene pool - in fact I highly encourage the practice - but when innocent others are affected, well, that's just not right.

The Gnu Herd stepped outside to enjoy the new fallen snow this morning, then ran back inside when The Missus announced the advent of hot cocoa. Ahh, nothing is finer than sipping hot cocoa next to a roaring fire, with a blanket of snow just outside the window.

Here's some pictures from a snowed-in Tobacco Road. Enjoy!


Snowfall on the homestead...


...and on the trees. This tree, by the way is a Thuja Occidentalis. I just like saying that. Makes me feel... smart.


Whoops. This isn't in my neighborhood! I'll bet a lot of my neighbors wish this was the view right now, though. This is from our trip to the Sunshine State for my Graduation back in December.

I just realized I never posted an update from our trip. Suffice it to say, a good time was had by all. Guess I'd better go dig up some more photos for a belated update...

all photos copyright 2009 - 2010, The Smoking Gnu
All rights reserved.

Southern Traditions

Well, here we are in 2010! I hope everyone survived the holidays without too much trauma. The Gnu Herd stayed home for New Years Eve, watching the NYC festivities from the warm comfort and relative safety of the living room. We toasted the end of 2009 with a little bubbly and then collapsed in bed. Yeah, we're gettin' old.

On New Years Day, we fixed the traditional Southern New Years Feast, commemorating our hopes for health, prosperity and fortune by means of ham hocks, collard greens and black-eyed peas. With cornbread. Gottta have cornbread for sure.

Many people avoid collard greens because of the bitter taste and the smell they make when you cook then. I contend that this is due to a lack of cooking technique. So with that in mind, I'll share with you my method for cooking up a good ol' mess o' greens:

Larriken's Mess O' Greens
Serving size: 1 Mess
Serving location: 1 Mess Hall (Sorry, couldn't resist)
Prep time: 10 minutes
Cook time: 1 hour, 10 minutes

Ingredients:
1 Lb fresh Collar Green leaves, prepared as directed below
1 small Ham Hock or 6-8 oz Salt Pork, diced
1 Small Onion, diced
1 Tbsp Minced Garlic or 3 fresh Garlic Cloves, minced
1/4 C Olive Oil
2 Tbsp Balsamic Vinegar
1 Tbsp Kosher or Sea Salt
1-2 Tsp Cracked Peppercorns or Coarsely Ground Pepper (I use the McCormick Peppercorn Medley Grinder because it has better flavor than your standard-fare black pepper and I can adjust the grind)

Preparation:
Collards - Don't buy them in a damn can, get the fresh ones they sell at the farmer's market or the produce section. Prepping collards is easy. Separate the leaves and wash them. Lay each leaf "face down" on a cutting board so that the stem is sticking up. Take a sharp, smooth-edged knife and cut the leaf from the base towards the tip following the edge of the stem as if it were a spine. Repeat on the other side so that you have two leafy halves. Throw away the stem (or feed it to your pet rabbit if he likes 'em.) Take a handful of the leaves and roll them into a Cuban cigar. Don't smoke 'em, just cut the roll across so you have slices of leaves in 1/2 inch strips. Pile the leaf strips into a colander and wash the whole mess o' greens once more to remove any residual sediment. Drain and pat dry.

Everything else - If you are watching your salt intake, here's a cool substitution tip for ya: Instead of salt pork, which is, oddly enough, salt cured with pork - no wait... Ahem.. moving on, instead of salt pork you can substitute a thick slice of regular, uncured ham. Marinade the diced ham in a lighter serving of Kosher salt or Sea salt to your preferred level of salinity for 30 minutes prior to cooking. I like to use Kosher or Sea salt instead of regular salt because the flavor is stronger per ounce so you don't need to use as much. Once you've settled on your choice of ham to use, put all the other ingredients except the collards into a small bowl and mix well. Let them marinade for a few minutes while you heat up the skillet.

Heat a large wok or high-walled skillet to medium-high. Mix all ingredients except for the collards and saute for 5 minutes to sear the ham and sweat the onions. Add the collards and toss the leaves to coat them with the olive oil, ham fat and vinegar. They will start to wilt and reduce over the next 5 minutes. Once the collards leaves have started to turn soft and bright green, pour just enough water to cover them, about 2-4 cups. Cover the skillet with a lid and reduce the heat to medium. Simmer for 1 hour until the leaves are soft, sweet and tender.

Once done, strain the collards from the skillet and turn the heat up to high to reduce the liquid remaining in the pan into a special gravy we Southerners call "pot liquor." Give the pan a good 5 minutes at a rapid boil, stirring constantly until the liquid is reduced by almost half. Serve with dinner in a gravy boat. This is good over mashed potatoes, meats and dipping for breads. It also makes a good stock for soups and is full of vitamins and good flavors.

Serve the collards hot with a side of black-eyed peas, ham steaks, and corn bread. Enjoy!

Southern tradition holds that collards represent good fortune or prosperity in the form of money, since they resemble folding greenbacks. Ham is for good health and the black-eyed peas are for good luck. The corn bread is just plain good eats no matter what. This is the traditional first meal served in the New Year. Enjoy and all the best for 2010!

Goodbye, 2009...

...And Good Riddance!

We ring out the old year tonight with a heaving sigh of relief that this year is over. 2009 was not a good year, for the Gnu Herd or many of our friends and loved ones. The year took a terrible toll, economically, emotionally, physically and personally. Most everyone we know agree, 2009 will go down as "The Year That Sucked."

It truly did. Starting off with a trip to the Emergency Room, continuing with the death of a beloved uncle, and climaxing in the sort of professional betrayal that no one should have to endure from a colleague I trusted implicitly but who proved himself unworthy of any esteem. You may have noticed I don't write about work too often here, and for good reason. I discovered too late that the career advancement I thought was a good idea turned out to be hell in disguise, a dysfunctional, maladjusted daycare for overgrown babies who need a hard spanking and time out in the corner until they learn to act like professional adults.

Two notable exceptions, however, to The Year That Sucked, but I had to wade through a year's worth of crap raining down on my head to get to them:

I finally graduated from The Graduate School with a Master of Science in Information Technology. Hallelujah! Two long, hard years of learning and slogging through long hours of studying, writing, reading, and at times, weeping. But I finally did it, realizing a decade-old goal - and I did it with a perfect 4.0 GPA! On top of that, I was honored to be inducted into the Honor Society and was also awarded the Outstanding Graduate Student of the Year. The Skating Gnu took notice and has been keeping pace with me in her own studies. It's good to know that being a positive role model can have a payoff every now and then.

The second good point from this past year took all damn year to get here, all the way till the last day. Today marks 15 years of our marriage. Ask Mrs. Gnu and she'll agree, what a long, strange trip it's been. I remind her that behind every successful man stands an amazed mother in-law. She reminds me that no one else would put up with my crap for so long, so I'd better not take her for granted. As always, she's right. A saint walks among us, folks!

I'm glad to see 2010 come and take its place, but I hope the next year is better than this last one. I don't think the country - or our circle of family and friends - can take another bad year.

So to all our friends we wish the very best for 2010. We pray for health, happiness and prosperity for everyone! We pray for our country and for those who defend her. We pray for those who are less fortunate that us, for in spite of the trials and tribulations we suffered through this year, there are those with even less to be thankful for. We pray for those people and give thanks for our blessings.

Happy New Year!

Recipe for a Happy Christmas

Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost.

Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a public example, was minded to put her away privily.

But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the LORD appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost.

And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins.

Matthew 1:18-21

Over the years, I've learned that all this overhyped commercial nonsense is so distracting that it is real easy to forget the real reason why the holidays exist. We spend too much time in overcrowded malls, wasting too much money on useless junk for people we can't stand to be with the rest of the year, and we wonder why the jingle bells always seem to ring so hollow. Maybe it's time we shunned the malls, banished Santa Clause, stomped out that annoying Jingle Bells song they play on a loop track everywhere, and get back to basics: the Real Reason for the Season, unadulterated, unfiltered, unchanged.

So, I've come up with a holiday recipe that I'm sure will help rekindle the True Spirit, in every sense of the phrase. I meant to post this yesterday, but better late than never. At least this way, you'll have all year to gather up the ingredients...

A Happy Christmas Recipe

Serving size: one heart
Calories: Who the hell cares
Allergy notices: Grinches, drunkards, jerks, drama queens, busybodies and crybabies should not partake unless they are ready to grow up and become real adults for a change.

Ingredients:
1 Warm home, ready to receive friends, family and God's blessings
3-4 Roomfuls of people you love, mixed well to induce good conversation
Several handfuls of hugs, liberally sprinkled all over
1 Table full of good eats, all homemade with love
1 Rooftop, overflowing with thanks to God, cheer for fellow men and women
1-2 Warm fireplaces for gatherings
Drinks on the house

Directions:
Place all ingredients in house, pause to give thanks to God to the wonderful food, great company and all the blessings of life. Plan without fear, welcome without hesitation, mix well and share with each other. Serve and enjoy.

Serve and enjoy. It's the last step in most recipes that were written down by hand and passed from one generation to the next. But isn't that really the sum total of God's wishes for us? Serve... and enjoy. Think about it...

Hope you had a Merry Christmas yesterday, a Rollicking Boxing Day today and a Happy New Year coming up!

Happy Thanksgiving

Well, we're now in high gear for the holiday insanity season. My expectations for human intelligence wanes to a seasonal low again as hordes of idiots from all corners of the globe crawl out of the woodwork to make fools of our entire species. I'm staying as far away from centers of commerce as I can, including grocery stores until the late, late hours just to keep from getting trampled. Forget the malls, I've been doing my holiday shopping online for the last 11 years. What little holiday shopping I do, that is.

Meanwhile, before the holiday hysteria drowns out reason again, I just wanted to take a moment to wish all of our friends a Happy Thanksgiving from the entire Gnu Herd. We are all thankful for your friendship and support through good times and bad.

Messin' Around

My wife is into the Destination Truth series on the SciFi channel. Yes, that's right: SciFi. I spelled it FUCKING CORRECTLY!! I refuse to use the "new and improved" name. It's a bullshit move and I hate it - what are you positioning the channel's viewership for, Twilight fans or something? Come on!

Anyways, she Tivo'd an episode where the team travels to the Himalayas to track down the Yeti. She's all into it and excited, and instead of sharing her excitement that maybe they'll find some concrete evidence confirming the existence of this mythical creature, all I can think of is...

This was a missed advertising opportunity for these guys:

In Flanders Field

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, MD (1872-1918)

A big thank you to all veterans - past, present and future - for all you do to protect freedom around the world! Every generation must repay the debt that is owed for the freedoms we enjoy. The generation that absolves itself of this, damns its future to miserable servitude.

Thank a veteran today. Do it again tomorrow.

Remember, Remember

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why the Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t'was his intent
To blow up the King and Parli'ment.
Three-score barrels of powder below
To prove old England's overthrow;
By God's providence he was catch'd
With a dark lantern and burning match.

Holloa boys, holloa boys, let the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!

While Guy Fawkes Day is more of a British event than here, the thought that a holiday can or should be dedicated to the remembrance of an act of treason is fascinating to me. We have no real equivalent here in the United States, no Benedict Arnold Day or such. So why is it so important for Britons to remember an attempted terrorist act that happened 404 years ago today?

Perhaps it's an important social reminder to succeeding generations of the importance of respect for the bounds of civil society, beyond which we should not let our passions take us. Originally there was an anti-catholic bent to the celebrations, but this was replaced over the years with the rhyme above, fireworks, and "a Penny for the Guy." The reminder that one's act of treason will not be forgotten is a powerful meme, one with strong social ties to the community to remind people that while it may be permissible in the pursuit of social discourse to take up opposing sides of important issues of the day, there are boundaries that are not to be crossed.

Indeed, this reminder might be a valuable token to offer our own so-called leadership in this country as to their obligations to respect the bounds of ethics, morality and the timeless values that bind human society together in ways that strengthen without enslaving, and without which society is reduced to anarchy and chaos. Leaders in business, government, religion, education and culture seem to have forgotten that to lead is to serve, that those who follow are not vassals to be toyed about or trifled with. Leaders who have fallen from the path of truth, who accept expediency over deliberation, the quick answer over the right answer, form over function, "right now" instead of just plain right.

The message needs to go further, to those who take their ill-considered beliefs to such extremes as to destroy the fabric they claim to be saving from others, those instigators who drive the masses towards decisions their grandchildren will regret for them. We should take notice of a month in history that should remind all future generations of the persistence of consequences that arise from ill-begotten actions: Red October, culminating in the 25th, 1917. In more recent history, we see how faith is twisted to serve evil purposes, to massacre innocent women and children for no other purpose than to amass power and reduce humanity to mere playthings of pretend gods, living - but mostly dying - at their idle whim. There are no greater evils in our world today than Fascist Islam, Socialism and Communism, who together have murdered and enslaved nearly half the planet.

These bankrupt philosophies are being repudiated around the world as people in many countries emerge from the darkness of misery, yet here in our own country, a cadre of "useful idiots" plow forth down the same paths to ruin, while the drunken and passionate cry of ignorant citizens along for the ride drives them on.

Remember, indeed. Treason to moral principles and values that are ageless, even God-given, is just as bad as betraying your country, and the consequences will be visited to the seventh generation.

Jockey's Ridge

In spite of the weather reports that spelled out gloom and doom all week, the weather in the norther Outer Banks wasn't all that bad last week. So we went for a trip out to Jockey's Ridge State Park.



This is the largest natural sand dune on the East Coast and is visible for miles around the area. I've never taken the opportunity to visit until now, and I can tell you, I'm really glad I didn't come here in the summer. The sand goes on for miles and I can only imagine how hot that would be in August. Sand temperatures tend to be much hotter than the surrounding air, so if it's 100 degrees outside, expect the sand you're walking on to be at least 120. Ouch!

Coming in October was good idea for cold-weather folks like us. Made for a much more enjoyable visit. Maybe next time, I can convince The Missus to let me go hang gliding!

Enjoy some more pictures from our hike around the park:



Above and below: Satellite dunes on the western side of Jockey's Ridge facing the Roanoke Sound. These smaller dunes move around a lot, and around the park in many spots you can see where some of the larger ones have swallowed up trees and shrubs. The more stable dunes provide shelters for tree groves and shrub thickets that become home to a wide variety of birds, mammals and reptiles. Walking along the nature trail, we were able to identify tracks from Raccoons, Possums, Egrets, a Hog Nose Snake, and field mice. In the air we saw Egrets, Cormorants, Geese, Ospreys, and Cranes. Thankfully, we had a steady 10mph wind that day so there were no mosquitoes buzzing around our heads.



Below: Roanoke Sound front at the western edge of the park. We found Brine Shrimp in little isolated pockets of still water along the edge and a fish or two jumping out of the water to greet us. Dragonflies were buzzing all over, darting in and out in search of prey.





Above and below: My attempts at photographing interesting sand formations along the dune face. For the most part, these are "raw" photos with no intense digital enhancements, only minor color adjustments to even out the saturation. My only accessory is a circular polarizing filter on my lens to clean up the sky and bring the clouds out.



Below: There is a semi-permanent brackish-water marsh in the Wadi at the base of Jockey's Ridge that is a favourite landing point for many species of migratory birds and also is home to a wide variety of other animals and plants.



all photos copyright 2009, The Smoking Gnu
All rights reserved.

Don't Look Down!

Scottie: It's because of this fear of heights I have, this acrophobia. I wake up at night seeing that man fall from the roof and I try to reach out to him, it's just...

Midge: It wasn't your fault.

Scottie: I know. That's what everybody tells me.

Midge: Johnny, the doctors explained to you.

Scottie: I know. I know. I have acrophobia which gives me vertigo and I get dizzy. Boy, what a moment to find out I had it!

Midge: Well, you've got it and there's no losing it. And there's no one to blame, so why quit?

Scottie: You mean and sit behind a desk, chair-bound...

Midge: ...where you belong.

Scottie: What about my acrophobia? What about... Now, suppose, suppose I'm sitting in this chair behind a desk, here's the desk, and a pencil falls from the desk down to the floor, and I reach down to pick up the pencil - BINGO - my acrophobia's back.

Midge: [Laughing.] Oh, Johnny-O.

-Vertigo (1958)
Alfred Hitchcock


Well, the Gnu Herd had a great time at the beach. When we got tired of looking at scenery right off the back porch like this...







...we went out to explore the island. Some friends came down to join us for the weekend, so we went up to Currituck Village to climb to the top of the lighthouse. Here's another video postcard from the top of the lighthouse:



Great view, huh? Don't look down if you're afraid of heights!!

Again, from the west side, looking over at the Keeper's house:



Yes, I know, my thumb makes another cameo appearance. Still, that's a lot better than filming my iPhone's untimely demise!

Looking up the spiral staircase on our way to the top...



Hello, hello (Hola!)
I'm at a place called Vertigo (¿Donde esta?)
It's everything I wish I didn't know
Except you give me something
I can feel, feel.

-U2, Vertigo
How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb (2004)

Here's some slightly more sane pictures of the grounds...

The Keeper's Quarters, at ground level:



Nice digs, huh?

The lighthouse from the sound:



The nature trail along the Currituck Sound:



The Currituck Sound:



Dunno why they call it a sound... I didn't hear a damn thing.

all photos and videos copyright 2009, The Smoking Gnu

Say Hello To My Little Friend

Walking back from the ocean the other day, I nearly did something that would have caused me to break out in tears of anguish... I almost stepped on this gorgeous fellow:



photo copyright 2009, The Smoking Gnu

Yep. That's a King Snake. A four-foot beauty too! Just sitting there on the boardwalk sunning himself when I came along and nearly walked right into him. These snakes are worth their weight in gold to a farm boy like me. Why? Easy... these buggers are so tough, they will kill a Copperhead! King snakes are great mousers too, better than any damn cat.

For a non-venomous snake, they are very excitable and aggressive in defending themselves. Then again, I did almost step on him, so I'm sure he was a bit upset at my clumsiness. I managed to catch him and after a bit of handling, I tamed him so me and the Skating Gnu could spend the afternoon playing with him while Mrs. Gnu cowered inside. She still doesn't quite understand my affection for these creatures, but bless her heart she puts up with it in her own way.

We keep finding ways of meeting up with all sorts of interesting fauna out here on the island. Two years ago, we ran into a Cottonmouth, this year a King snake - definitely an improvement!

After playing with him for a bit, we turned him loose on the dunes next to the ocean so he could continue doing his part in keeping the Town of Duck mouse-free.

Hopefully Copperhead-free too...

Life's a Beach

Back to the Outer Banks again this week. It's an annual pilgrimage that I look forward to every year. I don't care how much crap the universe throws on me, I'm gonna make it here and just relax for a week. This year especially, I need a damn break!

In case you were wondering what is it about Duck that draws us here, and at this time of the year, here are a couple of video postcards for you:




Did you see that? Exactly. Not a damn thing. No one around to pester me, and the weather has been in the mid-60s all week.

Here's another one for you, and this time I make a cameo appearance.



Well, my thumb does, anyways. Sorry about that. Some day's I'm just all thumbs!

all videos copyright 2009, The Smoking Gnu

Success by Degrees

My diploma arrived in the mail the other day. Got my name on it and everything.

Now it really hits home what I've accomplished and how hard I had to work for it. It's been a month since I finished my last class. I have since tried to replace the time with other projects and spend time with my family, but the intensity of these activities does not match what was required to finish those classes. I've been mostly hanging around the house not knowing what to do with myself, getting under foot and driving my wife nuts.

Conversations of the Damned, Part XXIV

After a week of getting in my wife's way, she'd finally had enough...

Mrs. Gnu: "Get outta my way, will ya? Don't you have homework to do?"

Me: "Umm.... NO!"

(Pause)

Mrs. Gnu: "Wasn't there a PhD program you were interested in...?"

God help this poor woman the day after I retire!

Do They Have to Grow Up So Fast?

Get thee to a nunnery, go: farewell. Or, if thou wilt needs marry, marry a fool; for wise men know well enough what monsters you make of them.

-Hamlet, Act 3, Scene 1

Saturday, The Skating Gnu had her first date. Let me repeat that in case you missed it:

Her. First. Date.

When the hell did she get old enough to go out on dates?!?!? So, we agreed to meet her beau somewhere for sodas and hamburgers. His parents and me at one table, the two of them at another table, trying their best to wish us away or at least make us invisible.

All in all, it went off pretty well. Good, wholesome fun was had by all, hands remained on top of the table, daylight between everyone, etc. Nice kid, I should add, and just to answer the question written all over your faces, no, I did not bring semi-automatic weaponry. I left them all at home, well cleaned and polished. And loaded.

Dammit, she's growing up way too fast. There is talk of a second date sometime in the near future. Mrs. Gnu can chaperon the next one: my poor heart can't take anymore of this.

I feel old...

It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it,
And I feel fine.

-REM

Victory Dance

I've paid my dues, time after time,
I've done my sentence, but committed no crime.
And bad mistakes, I've made a few,
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face,
But I've come through.

We are the champions, my friends!
And we'll keep on fighting till the end!
We are the champions,
We are the champions,
No time for losers,
'Cause we are the champions of the world!

I've taken my bows, and my curtain calls.
You brought me fame and fortune, and everything that goes with it,
I thank you all.

But it's been no bed of roses, no pleasure cruise.
I consider it a challenge before the whole human race,
And I ain't gonna lose!

We are the champions, my friends!
And we'll keep on fighting till the end!
We are the champions,
We are the champions,
No time for losers,
'Cause we are the champions of the world!

Queen
We are the Champions

Grades were posted last night. I got my A. That gives me a perfect 4.0 GPA for my Master's Degree.

Holy Cow. A perfect score. It belies the fact that this was two long, hard years of intensive study like on other I've attempted. It may look easy, but I put a lot of hard work and long hours into it. And I definitely believe that I got a lot out of this effort. I'm a lot better prepared to tackle my career path, especially now that I've moved up into management. There's a lot I still have to learn, but I've learned a lot already that I can use every day.

Test anxiety has now been packed away and sent off to cold storage.

Now all that's left to do is order my graduation robes an mortarboard. My wife and daughter got a big laugh from the order form: it asks for my height. Smartasses.

Will I wear anything underneath?

Stay tuned...

For SCIENCE!!!

COTD Part XVIII: For Science!!

The Skating Gnu: Daddy, I need your help with a science experiment.

Me: Okay, what's the experiment?

TSG: (Reads assignment) Prove that you are matter.

Me: *poke*

TSG: Ow!

Me: *poke* *poke* *poke* *poke* *poke* *poke* (you get the point)

TSG: Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! STOP IT!!!!

Me: Quod Erat Demonstratum! I've proved you are matter, and as a bonus you are madder!

The End of the Line

Well it's all right, even when push comes to shove,
Well it's all right, if you got someone to love,
Well it's all right, everything'll work out fine,
Well it's all right, we're going to the end of the line.

-End of the Line
The Traveling Wilburys

I posted my final, final exam this morning. I did it entirely by accident, however. Pushed the wrong button, but maybe it was a good thing. I was still reviewing my answers, tweaking my responses to the questions, and just all around agonizing over the damn thing. Time to be done with it. Worst I can do is flunk the test and if I've done my math right, I'll still pass the course with a C. Good enough to graduate, but I'd really like to get that last A.

What a long two years it's been. When I first started this, I had no idea how hard it would be to see it all the way through. I put a lot into this, and I feel like I've gotten every bit as much out, plus interest. Education is always a good investment, but more especially if you dive into it like there's no tomorrow.

So now, no more homework. no more reading thick textbooks or scrambling to organize research for papers. Test anxiety has been packed into a box and put in cold storage. I'm now in decompression mode, numb from the knowledge that I have lots of free time on my hands. It just feels weird not having so much stuff to do all night. I've accomplished something big for myself. It feels good, yet at the same time, a journey has ended. I've reached my goal.

This truly is the end of the line.

Time to start a new one.

Two Weeks Notice

Yep, that's right. Two weeks.

No, I'm not quitting anything. Tomorrow starts week 7 of 8 for my last class at the Graduate School. Wow. After two long years, it's finally coming to a close. The finish line is in sight. One last surge, the final push, dig deep and run like hell, eyes on the prize...

Just. Don't. Fucking. TRIP!

I'm holding on to an A in the last class, I. T. Project Management. With a death grip. Not letting go. I've maintained a perfect 4.0 average all the way through. All A's. Whoodathunkit?!?!

I kid you not, this has been a tough degree curriculum. This school is no easy ride. I put a lot of long hours into this, and I took every assignment seriously. That's just what you have to do to be successful. That's the advice I give every prospective student from grade school to grad school: you get out of it what you put into it. So dive in like there's no tomorrow.

Two more weeks, one more final exam, then I can start planning the party to end all parties. This one's gonna make the evening news.

The Way It Was: Walter Cronkite Remembered

An American icon passed away Friday. Walter Cronkite, once called "the most trusted man in America" has passed away at age 92. He is remembered as the pinnacle of journalistic professionalism and integrity, due to his even-handed reporting of the facts as they are, without spin or hidden agendas ready to leap out and pound the viewer over the head. He knew people expected the truth, warts and all, and that's what he endeavored to achieve.

“Objective journalism and an opinion column are about as similar as the Bible and Playboy magazine.” - Walter Cronkite

This is why viewers trusted him. He stuck to the facts. He left the opinions and spin control to pundits who were clearly identified as opinion providers, not newsmen. There is no doubt that he had opinions, but he recognized the absolute necessity of separating those from his obligation to stick to the facts and report the news as objectively as he could, not only for the sake of his viewers, but to preserve the integrity of the news itself. He defined the role of Anchorman like no other before or since. The term itself was created for him, and no one else wore the title like he did.

This is in sharp contrast to the yellow journalism and petty guttersnipes that have infested the news organizations of today. It is absolutely inexcusable how the press has allowed itself to degenerate to such depths of mediocrity, saddling itself with carrying water for political hacks whose ideals are half-baked at best or worse, place the future of our American civilization in grave danger of collapse and ruin.

Journalism and Mass Communication, as a profession, has sunk to levels of distrust usually reserved for used car or insurance salesmen. Even politicians, the new slave masters for so many "reporters" in the field today, rate higher in the public eye, which isn't saying much at all. How can you report the news and be credible if you're in bed with the very subjects you are reporting on? The line between reporter and commentator has been blurred so much that the two can no longer operate separately. And this has killed the primary objective of journalism: to report the truth.

“Our job is only to hold up the mirror - to tell and show the public what has happened.” -Walter Cronkite

There will never again be another man in whom the American people can trust to tell the truth. What a sad reality we must learn to live with.

And that's the way it is.

Walter Leland Cronkite, Jr.
November 4, 1916 – July 17, 2009

An Independence Day Message

The Gnu Herd is having a muted celebration of America's Independence this year.

Not only because of the loss of our freedoms thanks to a runaway Congress hell-bent on instituting Soviet-style Communism whether the American people want it or not; an activist Judiciary who can no longer comprehend the concept of Equal Protection under the Rule of Law; a rank-amateur of a President who cannot form a single cogent thought on his own without the hidden hand of a teleprompter behind the throne; a fawning - nay, fellating - press frittering away its trusted obligation to report the whole truth as it is, in favour of carefully scripted, over-choreographed press conferences that avoid the truth altogether; and a plebeian voting population that is completely incapable of rational thought, their hearts set upon, just as in Roman times, bread and circuses. These things happen throughout the course of human history, and it is the fate of our generation to relearn these lessons all over again, so our progeny can pick up the pieces of our ruined civilization and start afresh.

No, our sadness goes deeper and more personal: we lost a favourite uncle this week. Mrs. Gnu's uncle passed away at the end of June after a quick decline in health. We mourn his passing and the loss of his presence in our lives. He was almost 80 and had lived a good, happy life, loved by all who knew him.

He was also a veteran of the Korean War and this brings me to the heart of my message. Veterans stood up to be counted to perform a sacred duty to their country, and whether they were drafted or volunteered, they did not run away. These men and women fought hard in all corners of the globe to defend our freedoms, our country, our way of life from enemies of all kinds: Communism, Fascism, National Socialism (look that one up, little children, and never forget), Islam, and in many cases just stepping in to do the right thing while the world stood by and talked about the weather (Grenada, Liberia, Somalia, Serbia, Lebanon, Kuwait, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Panama, yeah the list goes on and on to the continuing shame of the rest of the world). Veterans performed their duty with honour and they deserve our enduring thanks.



The veterans of Korea have largely been forgotten, stuck as it were between the Greatest Generation and the Baby Boomers. Their contribution to our heritage is no less important however. They deserve our heartfelt thanks just as much as any other group that stood to defend our country. My wife's uncle had lots of stories to tell about his times on the peninsula at the 38th Parallel. We heard about triumph, tragedy, comedy, boredom, sadness and danger. We learned a lot about what it means to answer the call of duty, even in the face of rising voices of complacency, cowardice and political abandonment, which would become even more shrill and irrational in the coming decade for another war.

Most people do not know anything about the Korean War except for the TV comedy, M*A*S*H (a great show in its own right, but hardly a record of the true story). Try finding someone who can tell you what MiG Alley was, or where Pork Chop Hill is located on a map - not because they read about it, but because they were there and remember what it was really like. If you're lucky enough to know a veteran, take the time to sit a spell and listen. Their story is part of our folklore, a personal deposit into the archives of American history, and a fast-disappearing one at that. Don't let their voices go unheard, their experiences lost with the dimming of years and fading of memories. Don't just hug a veteran, listen to them tell their tale. They have an important contribution to the history of our nation, and if we disregard their lessons, we may find ourselves repeating the tragedies they suffered through.

For all true Americans, serving abroad in uniform, holding down the home-front, and standing up for the shining ideal that is the Spirit of America, we extend our wishes for a Safe and Happy Independence Day.